Vacation Over.

I start my 8th and FINAL quarter in less than a week and I am sitting in my apartment wondering where in God's name the 730 days that are the last 2 years have gone. This time of year makes me think about all that led up to me coming to Portfolio Center, how much my life has changed in the past 2 years and how much I have grown. I think all of this changed started on 9/11, really...I had recently ended a pretty unhealthy relationship, moved back to Baton Rouge, was thinking about starting graduate school for Social Work and then BAM.

The world changed when those two towers fell to the ground.

At that point I realized I could either make choices from a place of safety and security or I could go for what I really wanted and not apologize for it. I chose a relationship my family could not understand or accept because LOVE was more important than acceptance from my family. It still is. Allowing that love into my life opened my mind and heart up to the freedom to create and express myself artistically. I had always been a "dabbler" in painting and drawing but never considered it something I could turn into a career. I was too logical and in my head to make that connection. Now, I cannot imagine doing anything other than what I am doing...and I've really only begun.

And yet I am nearing the end of my first big step. My first BIG commitment both financially and emotionally. As I go through my apartment, cleaning, organizing, gathering my work from the past 2 years, preparing for the next 3 months, I frequently come across reminders of my pre-PC life. Pictures, letters, boxes, a dog collar, feathers, seashells, wine labels...I keep everything. I wonder if I'll always be a pack-rat. I wonder why I am such a pack-rat. Some people argue that these things are not important, that we collect TOO much. I guess I keep these things as evidence of my existence...where I came from, who I love, what matters to me. How I got here in the first place, what I have learned along the way. I think those things are important....more important than a chair to sit in or a bed to sleep in because when it comes down to it, we have to be able to find peace in our heads and hearts.

I used to wish I had fewer boxes of memories. I used to think it would be nice to fit it all in some tidy leather-bound scrapbook with my initials embossed on the cover...I used to think I would have been more successful, more happy, less searching, less complicated if I had chosen safer things, things that had some security built in. I used to WISH I could just be happy doing what seemed more normal, more linear, less random. I imagine now that, like the chaos theory in math and physics, " the behavior of chaotic systems (aka, Mary Campbell) appears to be random, because of an exponential growth of errors in the initial conditions but these systems (aka Mary Campbell) are deterministic in the sense that their future dynamics are well defined by their initial conditions, and there are no random elements involved." So, perhaps, all of these seemingly disconnected events and choices have really just been pushing me to this point. I think I have always believed that; otherwise, I'd probably be working at a bank right now wearing navy blue pants and a matching jacket with my name tag proudly displayed on the lapel.

Vacation update.

This has turned into a MOST beautiful week here in Florida...it warmed up on Tuesday and has been sunny and gorgeous ever since. I have cooked every night, we have watched trash T.V, and had great conversations about everything from the war in Iraq to the future of cars, to how dumb IS Tara Reid? Aaaah, vacation. Alas, ill fated luck had to befall at least one of us temporarily on this trip....naturally I was the victim of aforementioned bad luck. Here's a trivia question for you: what happens when you combine the cumulative effects of stress, dehydration, too much sun and me? That would be, sun poisoning. Last night, on our adventure to Seaside, I started to feel ill...like vomit-city ill...there is nothing in the world that I, Mary Campbell, hate more than vomiting. Maybe George Bush, but I'm not sure. Cutting short our adventure into town, we returned to the condo where I lay ill for the rest of the night only to wake up at 1am soaked with sweat. As it turns out, my body decided to launch an all out assault on my sun ravished body and I was feverish until my fever broke at 1am. Today I am a little tired, but feeling better and we are going to set out for the outlet malls of Destin to see what kind of sweet deals we can get on Nike shoes, Gap t-shirts and godonlyknows what else.

In other news, the dogs are still doing well...turns out I have a slight addiction to the wag-a-lot webcam. They also take daily pics of your dogs and post them to the website. Red was the "featured" pup on Tuesday....he's such a ham.
Here is Red looking TOO cute:

Here is Fox sniffing another dog's butt:

Here is Pheiffer looking sad and ready to come home:

and here I am fast asleep in the sun, poisoning myself.

v a c a t i o n

Well...it's a chilly day in Florida and my GF and I are trying to brave the elements. After an exhausting quarter and a lot of hard work, we decided to take a week off, get out of town and do NOTHING. How excited am I? ....you have no idea. I had a shitty critique...that is life...saw am amazing Lucinda Williams concert and got the hell out of dodge. The COOLEST part is that we can watch the dogs on the WAG A LOT webcam. We usually find Red sitting on the bench (when it is there), Fox running around trying to hump a pug and Pheifer sitting in the corner looking sad. Hopefully, it will warm up in the next few days so we can return to Atlanta looking like the bronzed goddesses that we know we can be versus looking more pasty and white than when we left. GF just suggested that we drink copious amounts of alcohol to warm us and then pass out on the beach so we can catch some rays. Hmmm....and she is a nurse, ladies and gentleman. I'll be parking my ass on the couch with my warm laptop for at least a few more hours.

mary campbell design.

Well, after many hours of laboring over Flash, GoLive, FTP uploading software and photoshop....not to mention a LOT of cursing....I have my first incarnation of a website for myself. I welcome all and any feedback. I will be adding more information to tell the *story* behind my work and will be putting a brief bio on the "learn" page but this is going to be the framework for things to come. I'm pretty pleased...it's not really fancy, but I'd never used Flash before nor had I done any web publishing prior to this (at least, on a mac). Oh, and PLEASE forgive the lapse in time that it takes to upload the flash file...despite my best attempts, I could NOT get a friggin' loader bar to work for me. I want to make it a LOT more interactive...but I have to take baby steps so that I don't lose my sanity before the end of the quarter.

marycampbelldesign.com

Speaking of Faith

Just wanted to pass along this information....Krista Tippett from Public Radio's "Speaking of Faith" program is going to be speaking in Atlanta this evening at the Carter Center Chapel (see info below). Should be very interesting.

March 9, 2007 (7:00 p.m.)
Carter Center Cecil B. Day Chapel
453 Freedom Parkway NE
Atlanta, GA
404.865.7100 [A Capella Books]

self-promo.

So....I am working on a self-promotional piece based off a woven narrative project. Here's where it is right now...I LOVE calligraphy. I don't have much else other than that at this particular time...it's studio week, I am stressed and trying to maintain my sanity while feverishly finishing (and, in some cases, starting and re-doing projects like, um, my website...). Have I mentioned that I hate Flash as much as I love calligraphy? Well, I do...it's a great program but my mind is way too impatient to figure it out. That is why the world made 30-year-old males who LOVE flash and video games but lack many of the social and creative skills to have a girlfriend and, instead, are in love with their computers and nintendo. I know I have, most likely, offended many of my peers and friends and that is okay because I will blame my choice of words and opinions on sleep deprivation and stress.

Thank you and goodnight.

"Faggot for President"

Here is the thing....I think everyone has the right to speak his or her mind. Should we censor Ann Coulter? No. She has the freedom to share her views with the whomever chooses to listen to her. Should we excuse a person's ignorance or intolerance because of a *substance abuse* problem? Probably not, but that is, altogether, another topic. My problem with Ann Coulter's indescretion is that if you follow her line of reasoning AND if you look at her choice of semantics, she would readily endorse a person's anti-semitic, racist, homophobic rhetoric. Should anyone be able to express him or herself as he or she sees fit? ...well, that is the beauty of this country...it is built on this freedom but, C'MON people...

B-Ball.

This weekend, my lady friend and I decided to go to the women's SEC basketball tournament in Duluth, Georgia. Several years back, I dated someone who was a fanatic about sports and I, by default, got somewhat interested in the game. Seriously people, I don't watch sports with any degree of regularity but one night over a lovely dinner and, perhaps, a few glasses of wine with some friends we decided that attending the 3-day tournament of games would be the *best*idea*ever.* Well, admittedly, one should never make commitments while *on wine,* but, as it turns out we had a fabulous time. LSU won 2 of the three games we attended, but lost the final, championship game tonight...alas, my rooting for the home team did not make the definitive difference.

Highlights from the weekend were a game commentary made by me: "games are HARD aren't they?" To which my lovely, kind lady responded, "yes, honey....games ARE hard....you should probably stick to playing with your crayons..." For the record, what I meant was that the level of speed and agility that these women have while communicating with each other in a very fast paced game was impressive. I would be laboring over what to do while the other team stole the ball from me and made a touchdown.

Another highlight occurred while we were in line for some ice cream. A elderly lady Tennessee fan came up to us and asked where we were from; gleefully, my companions responded "Atlanta!" and I, "Baton Rouge!" Then she accused us of cutting in line and interrogated us on the matter for about 5 minutes. For the record, we did not cut in line. I think she was just in a huff because her silly team lost.

As a side note, I learned that the following *sports fan* diet is not a good idea for someone like me:
Chick-fil-A sandwich and fries for lunch.
Hot dog with extra saurkraut (sp) and mustard for dinner
Mint chocolate chip ice cream for dessert.

All in all, I highly recommend doing something out of the ordinary every now and then...like attending a sports tournament.

Geaux Tigers.

Suburbia.

Yeah, I know...I am a suck-ass blogger. I have been really busy working on various school-related things. The end of the quarter is upon us and it is nearing that ever-lovely crunch time. I have some other work to show...I have been in a class that is for the ONE show competition and we did a series of ads...I must say, I am pretty pleased with how they came out. I'll post once the deadline for entering passes. Here are some posters I did for a project on suburbia. It was a most challenging project because the most frequently asked question is "what about suburbia?" Yeah....what ABOUT it? After talking frequently with Tania who resides in a suburban area (Marietta, GA), I was finally able to figure out what angle I wanted to take. The thing that I cannot handle is this homogenization that developers enforce upon previously more eclectic neighborhoods. In lieu of diversity, cookie cutter McMansions are erected. All of this because we want MORE, BIGGER, BETTER live-in trophies. So, that is my concept. Here are the posters! Ridiculously enough, these are the first posters I have done with my own style of illustration. I don't know why I have had such a hard time bringing myself into my work, but I think it has paid off with these pieces.

This is for Stella

This is for Tania's dog, Stella who HATES me. Every time I am around this sweet little beast, she growls at me or just goes for the kill and attacks my ankles. I just want her to love me. That's all.

A bonus post.

This month's Word It on Speak Up, "YELL!".

A little something....

A quote for especially for today:
"The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate. -Oprah Winfrey"

It's been a busy week. In fact, this quarter has been entirely too hectic for my taste, but the pending final quarter that is looming over my head prevents me from yielding to my subtle tendency to slack off. That said, I have a few things to share with my loving audience...First, two CDs that are MUST HAVES. Norah Jones, "Not Too Late;" perhaps, my favorite CD of hers.

Best songs: 1. Not Too Late 2. The Sun Doesn't Like You 3. Not My Friend

Lucinda Williams, "West." It's gotten kick ass reviews and is amazing. In fact, GF and I are going to see her at the Tabernacle here in Atlanta on March 17...if the show is not sold out, RUN and get tickets. The song I am playing over and over right now...#2, Mama You Sweet and #12, Words. The ENTIRE CD is rockin, however.


The second recommendation I have to share is a new beverage by Coke. Enviga... The green tea is KICK ASS...a little fizz and not too sweet, plus it claims to burn calories....but I seriously doubt that it will kill the pepperoni pizza and red wine I had last night while watching the movie, "In the Bedroom." If you haven't seen it, RENT IT. I love Sissy Spacek; she is truly an amazing actor.

That's about all I have for today. Maybe more later. Probably not, but a girl can dream.

Dreams of Tigers.

It seems as though, every once in a while, I have a series of, shall we say, thematic dreams. Lately, I have had dreams of white tigers. In my dream, I am tentative around him but not so much afraid. He is almost like my cat, Oliver but he doesn't realize he is not a domesticated tabby cat but a full sized tiger and he is VERY close to me. The strange part is that I can talk to the Tiger and I'm not even sure I am talking per-se, but we are communicating. In my dream, I am a little nervous around the tiger but not afraid, just wanting to be careful with him because everyone around us is not comfortable with him...go figure, a full sized tiger inciting fear. This is my second tiger dream in the past month...so I started getting curious about what tigers represent. See below...pretty interesting.

F*ck Creative Circus.

aaaaawwwww yeaaahhhhh.

Spring!

I have never been one of these people who looks forward to Spring. I am a Fall girl. I love the colors, the clothes, the chill in the air. Fall has always had more energy to it than Spring. In fact, I have been known to get slightly depressed with in the onset of Spring. A funny thing happened to me on my run, yesterday. I got excited when I felt the anticipation of Spring around me. I realized that I hate coming home at 7pm and it being dark outside. I hate even more the fact that, as a very cold-natured person, I nearly freeze to death on dog walks in the fall and winter (even here in Atlanta....yeah, I am a wimp). In fact, there is nothing I like about the cold weather except for scarves, sweaters, and fires in the fireplace. Other than that, I am a miserable wimp when it comes to anything below 60 degrees.

This year, however, is different. Spring is full of excitement and MUCH anticipation. Anticipation of finishing school (in 6 months!!), anticipation of finding a job that I will enjoy, anticipation of really continuing on this journey that started for me 2 years ago and I have a tendency to get overwhelmed with all of the anticipating. I obsessively worry about it. I chew and chew and chew on things until I have thought them to death. Oh, and I don't sleep. Yes, that is my favorite part. Not getting restful sleep because I wake up and worry. I worry about things that I have no control over and I worry about things that I should have control over but do not. I worry until my head is pounding and my eyes are burning...and I worry about my worrying. I realize that I am worrying too much and I worry about how to stop worrying. If you are thinking that this sounds ridiculous, it is. Does anything ever get accomplished with all of this worrying? Not often. So, my goal for this Spring is to learn new ways to *relax.* I am not someone who easily turns her brain off. I am constantly thinking about what I could/should/or would (rather be) doing. I am either thinking small like...how can I organize my closet to be more efficient or how can I change the world or what kind of business would I start if I could or should I eat chicken or beef for dinner....oh, and that is all happening at the same time.

It has been suggested that I start meditating. Running is like meditation for me. I can completely relax, turn off my brain, use my body and let my mind go. The only problem is that, thanks to years of abusing my body, I have really shitty knees that make a revolting crunching noise when I run. Surely, this is not good. I know it is not but I *sort of * refuse to heed the warnings of nature and insist upon continuing to run. I'll work on that...add it to my list. I'll probably start worrying about that, too.

In the meantime, at the top of my list of things to do is to learn how to stay fully in the present and not worry about those things over which I have no control. I'll get right to that...

edge

I stumbled across this cool as shittake website the other day...it has a TON of really interesting information on science, ethics, religion, etc...definitely worth a peek if you are even slightly curious about the "big" questions of the universe. edge.org

My gift to you on this lovely Thursday afternoon.

Bodoni.

Greetings readers.
I am working on a project about the typeface, Bodoni.
If anyone out there is interested in participating in my project and would like to answer a few quick questions about this typeface, I would WELCOME any feedback!
Here are my questions...

1. If Bodoni were the last and only typeface available to you on the earth and you were charged with setting a block of text, a headline or just a word with Bodoni using one or all of the various weights available to you, what text would you choose and how would you set it? (for example, would you set the Lord's Prayer in Bodoni Italic or would it be "gangsta rap" lyrics in Bodoni Bold Condensed?)

2. Considering the overall geometric structure of the Bodoni typeface and the beautiful contrast between the thick and thin strokes featured in this typeface, if Bodoni were the only typeface that you could design with, what would you change about it?

3. If Bodoni were a famous person, male or female, who would Bodoni be?

Thanks!

Molly Ivins

“Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful." -Molly Ivins

Sadly enough, one of the sharpest, funniest, most intelligent women in politics passed away on Wednesday of this week to breast cancer. I was lucky enough to hear her speak a few years ago at Tulane in New Orleans and she was amazing. Though I do not have a particular affinity towards Texas, there is a certain brand of woman that comes out of this state. Along with Ann Richards, Molly Ivins was a "tell it like it is" kind of woman with great wit, intelligence and strength. She will be missed.

Shameless love.

For those of you who do not know this...I am madly in love with my two dogs, Red and Fox. Featured in the above pics, Red is the hat-wearing beagle who loves sleeping, defending his chew toys and being referee to all other dogs. Fox is the *innocent* terrier who enjoys snuggling, chasing the cats, eating tampons out of the trash and NOT listening to any commands including: "NO!", "get down," "Sit!," "hush," or "Go get mommy a drink."

wonder.

Here is this month's entry for SpeakUp's Word It, "wonder."