Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Change is hard.


"Just stay focused. Don't react. Just be a witness and you will see the magic of it." - Swami Chidanand Saraswatiji

I have a love-hate relationship with change. As much as I seek it out and embrace it, the letting go of the old and mourning of the past is the part I dread. I suppose no one out there really likes that... In times of change, my mantra is usually to buckle down, move forward and "stay strong." In other words, I typically tune out any emotional response I may be having and just become numb. It works...really, it does.

Okay, truth be told, it doesn't work. It just creates a stockpile of unresolved emotions.

I am in the middle of HUGE change. I have finished school, gotten a "real" job, moved in with my girlfriend and closed a massive chapter of my life. Whew. Consciousness is a bitch. Now I remember why I liked to tune out emotional responses...because they are hard but THIS time, I am choosing to do things differently. I am staying open (even if cautiously so) to all that is bundled up in this mass of change.

But isn't that why we are all here? To challenge ourselves to grow and be open to the opportunities life offers us to change? If I have learned nothing else in the past 5 years, I have learned to be open to change, and willing to look at all aspects of myself and work on those parts that are deficit. I have found plenty since I started looking, but, really, who wouldn't? That is the beauty of the human spirit...that we are alive, a compilation of complex experiences, emotions, thoughts, choices...all interwoven and layered over an even more complex and mysterious matrix of biology.

If nothing else, this proves to me that there is a higher power.

5 comments:

jessica said...

My mom says that even good change is stressful. It is so true! Especially when you have a job, relationship, responsibility and no time to process it all.

Thanks for the sites and podcasts!

Jessica said...

BY THE WAY: You spelled my name wrrrrrong. Not Tyler. It's Tillyer. It happens constantly. Haha.

Ty said...

I admire your willingness to embrace change. If you have any more suggestions on how better to deal, please feel free to share.

Tania Rochelle said...

I cry when I have to change my shirt.

ktothefe said...

I love change, and have been raised in it all of my life. It's not always easy and not always fun, but it's definitely always emotional. The best thing you can do, in my opinion, is be nice to yourself and allow yourself to feel that emotion. Even if it hurts. You'll only be better for it.

Congrats on the life-change and choosing to be open about it.